Good riddance!!

As detailed in Part I, I had a benign brain tumor removed on December 24, 2011. Surgery went perfectly, the tumor was fully-excised, and I was released from the hospital 3 days post-op. The main medication I have been required to take for the two weeks post-op is called Dexamethasone. It is an extremely powerful corticosteroid medication which serves to reduce the inflammatory response and aid the healing process. Many people have heard of Prednisone, a related drug. Dexamethasone is 26 times stronger than the body’s natural cortisol and 6 times stronger than Prednisone — a common drug for treating conditions such as asthma, MS, and many others.

Unfortunately, all corticosteroids work by activating the cortisol reaction in the body. This is part of your adrenal “fight-or-flight” response and is frequently called the Stress Hormone. On the drug, you can suffer what’s called Steroid Psychosis. I had heard of this phenomenon before, but experiencing it has been quite the ride.

Basically, I have felt like I was on what I could only imagine as bad speed, 24/7, for the last 2 weeks. My mind will NOT settle. Ever. I feel as if every cell in my body is vibrating, and not in a good way.  I cannot focus my thoughts or concentrate. Simple things like making breakfast become a challenge of step-by-step actions. I have to literally tell myself, “Get out a bowl. Get a spoon. Get the cereal. Pour it out. Get the milk.” etc. For someone who’s brain usually works quite smoothly and quickly, this process is very clunky and debilitating. During the first week home, I didn’t accomplish much because I was just unable to.

Because my thoughts have been so disjointed and racing, it’s been hard for me to hold a conversation. People will phone, but I know I’m not sounding “right.” My voice is affected a bit and will shake. By far the worst part of the entire experience has been the lack of ability to sleep. Because of the stress response, relaxation has been impossible and sleep is elusive. I have been able to sleep a few hours at a time, maximum, and then I’m up again. I have been surviving on about 1/3 of my normal sleep schedule which only serves to make the fuzziness and inability to concentrate even worse.

Dexamethasone (and all corticosteroids) are tapered down slowly to ease the body’s recovery process from the drug. I have been taking a smaller and smaller dosage over the course of the last 2 weeks. Yesterday was my last tablet, and today I am feeling the beginnings of feeling normal again, but I still wasn’t able to sleep last night. That may take a few days of clearance yet, and I don’t expect to be fully clear of the drug for a few weeks.

Additionally, there are other toxic side effects. My digestion has been dreadful. I have been using senna tea daily to ensure movement, but the gut-aches have been unpleasant. My appetite has increased something akin to Cookie Monster or Animal – again, a reaction to the increased cortisol. Ever hear of stress eating? I had a Lapband placed in 2008 and therefore my stomach is restricted, but my brain is so ravenous, all I can think about is food! I have absolutely been over-eating, but trying to mitigate the damage by eating whole, vegetable-based foods. Even so, I know my calorie consumption overall has been enormous, compared to my “normal” eating. Even with the Lapband restriction, I am compelled to eat. This has been very difficult for me because I struggle with my weight anyway, and being so out of control is terribly disturbing. I have gained about 10 lbs in the last week (some of which is water) and I can’t wait to begin to lose it again!

Another really awful side effect is steroid-induced acne.  This may be the most demoralizing side effect. The rash started about Day 8 or 9 post-op. The pustules seem to be responding well to benzoyl peroxide acne medicine, but this is THE WORST acne rash I have ever had. My normally clear skin has completely disappeared. I obviously have been wearing no makeup and clean my face twice a day. I don’t think there’s anything that can be done except wait to heal on this one and it seems to be taking its time.

Steroid induced acne. My skin has NEVER looked worse!

I also am suffering another common steroid effect of “moon-face.” I have generalized edema everywhere, but the facial swelling has been an interesting phenomenon to see. Not only is my face very swollen in the cheeks, at ear-level, I have this enormous double chin that is not normally mine! I don’t even recognize myself!! My self-esteem is really suffering at the moment, but at least I know it’s all temporary and will heal.

The "moon-face" effect.

I wanted to chronicle this so others may benefit from my experience. I had intellectual knowledge of these side-effects, but having an idea and actually experiencing it have been two different things. Had I known better what to expect, perhaps it might not have been so difficult; although, I think it’s just something one has to suffer through and hang in there by one’s fingernails!

In Part III, I will discuss how I intend to use Natural Healing Remedies to clear my system of my personal chemo hell and begin to cleanse and heal.